ongoing mental confusion issues

We went from awful, negative brutal temperatures to mid 60's in a flash.  I saw one meteorologist say the temperature change between last Tuesday to this Tuesday was 92 degrees!  I am not sad about it.  Not in the least.  But my brain has jumped right into spring/summer mode, which any reasonable person would know is dangerous.  This is Kansas.  This is still February.  We all know what March is - a bipolar month of anything possible weather wise.  My brain can't take it.  I am done with winter almost as soon as it begins.  I crave sunshine, warm breezes, gardening, green grass, and fresh vegetables.  I spend the entire winter counting the days until I can break out my flip flops and tuck away my socks.  Things I hate about winter the most?  The dark.  The feeling that the air wants to kill you.  Socks.  The bazillion coats that inevitably end up piled inside the door, in the dining room, on the couch in the living room.  The extra laundry from needing to wear layers.  Did I mention socks?  Gosh I hate socks the most.  

And do you know what else doesn't help with the reality that it IS STILL WINTER?  Last night, Jim and I went shopping.  I needed a lot of stuff from town.  Every single store has out spring plants, garden tools, seed packets, flower bed displays.  And where is Hope?  Well, I am pushing my cart right towards all of the summer items.  Never mind that I came into the store to get supplies for a bridal shower, I am in the garden section.  Never mind that it is only 60 degrees and the pool is not even together, I am plopping a bucket of chlorine right into the cart.  I was a little bit worried that Jim's eyes were going to get stuck like that as he rolled them for the 3rd time, but then he went on to help me pick out a few berry plants that I wanted to get started inside now.  He may not understand my desire to create work for myself, but he also doesn't try to stop it!  Heck, usually he comes around to even embracing it and helping a girl out!  :)  It is why I love him.  

The girls and I have big garden plans.  Andrew and I have ordered our spring broilers and new laying hens.  We are just waiting it out now - downhill slide right?  

Of course it wouldn't be spring if you didn't talk about baby animals.  Colin sent me a new picture of my puppy!  I cant' believe how much she has grown since were down there!  She has 2 more weeks until she comes home.  But seriously, is this not the cutest little face?  I am completely obsessed!  Little Maude Mae - I can't wait to get my hands on you!  

I showed the photo to Ollie - he is so excited!  

This jerk is not excited....she said she is planning a revolt! 

And now to just wait out the slow slide into the weekend.  I am here for some much needed time at home!

 

wondering what happened

A few things - first - this weekend went entirely too fast.  I need a do-over.  And second- I love any weekend where I get to hang out with my people - and this was good for that.  

And third - the world is feeling a little bleak to me right now.  It makes me worried for the future of our country, and scared for my kids and grandkids.  I am trying to make sure my people know they are loved, and that we will do anything in our power (legally) to make things better.  

And sometimes, when the world feels like it is in complete chaos, I do what I do best.  I buy craft supplies, and pretend that we are sane.  As I was looking for some things to do with the girls, I ran across these little wooden bunnies.  I think they are about the cutest things ever!  I couldn't resist!  Do I need wooden bunnies?  Probably not.  But look at 'em!  

Last week, Andrew asked me if I would keep the girls overnight so that he could take Madison out and have a night away.  I told him sure - that would be fun.  I also told him that I had to take Harper and Saige to work at 4-H club day, so I would call him when we were done.  Harper and Saige and I were the clean up crew.  The 4-H agent took photos of how the rooms were set up, so it was pretty easy to put things back as they were before.  The girls worked pretty hard, and we were done in a short amount of time.  We stopped off for shower gifts, and feed for the goats/chickens.  And then we noticed that there is a Dollar Tree in Ottawa - a great place to buy crafty stuff for our evening!  We also hit the hardware store.  We got all the things.  Sometimes retail therapy is the best!  

I told Andrew I would trade watching the girls for him helping Jim retrieve the truck out of the trees (Jim was trying to take care of a project and got stuck.)  Cameron came to the house yesterday to get some paperwork, and the three boys were able to get the truck back up out of the forest!  It was nice to see Cameron for a little bit, and have some lunch together, before I had to leave to work at the liquor store.  Madison and the girls stayed at the house working on laundry, since their washer was having issues.  Jim and Andrew went fishing.  The weather was literally 70 degrees warmer than it was Wednesday of last week!  Crazy to think about.  I believe it was 60 degrees yesterday- felt like summertime!  We sold a lot of beer to people who said they were going home to sit on their porches!

On Saturday evening, hearing that we were doing crafts, Mallory brought some stuff of her own to do!  The girls all had fun making flower pots and stain glass windows.  Wrenley Kay enjoyed it a little more than she probably should have, good thing it was non-toxic paint!  Mallory helped me wrangle Wrenley while I cooked dinner.  After a couple hours of wrangling, Mallory tapped out!  Jim then tried to take over helping me.  He attempted to rock the kid to sleep while I cleaned up the kitchen.  That was a no from the Wren.  :)  I got her to sleep, and since she is used to sleeping with Madison and Andrew, I threw her in our bed.  Jim  was going to lay with her while I finished some stuff.  That was also a no.  Meaning, I got to bed early!  Jim then decided it has been too long since we had children in our bed, and he decided to sleep on the floor.  I woke up at 3 am - with little tiny feet in my neck - and I was on about 3 inches of bed.  Jim and I have a king size bed - Wrenley took over the entire thing!  

I took the girls to mass with us.  They were both so well behaved.  Wrenley never made a sound.  She did crawl under the pew and sit with a different family for a little bit!  :)  She also grabbed me by the back of my hair, yanked my face over and gave me a huge, wet, open mouth kiss!  Guess I know how I caught this cold!  :)  

When the girls left, and Mallory's dogs were gone, our cats showed their faces back upstairs!  I think Tooth was exhausted!  Or he might be broken....?  

The warmer weather, and longer days have meant that my chickens are laying again.  I am so glad - eggs are expensive!  I sent a picture to Jim and told him we got $75 worth of eggs in one day!  :)  He laughed.  Then I told him it was time to order some more chickens.  He definitely did not say no!  :)  New project of the week  - picking out some new laying hens!  

Have I mentioned my ultimate someday I want?  Someday, without a doubt, I am going to order the "hatchery surprise box" - you get 50 birds - whatever the hatchery has extras of that day.  You might get chickens, or turkeys, or geese, or whatever they ship you.  I can't think of anything more fun.  Jim doesn't seem like he is overly excited by being surprised in this way.  Hey, a girl can dream right? 

 

Not for dogs ... definitely not for me!

The weather has turned into a gross, cold, artic mess this week.  We have had about 5 inches of snow, and temperatures that don't get out of the negative numbers.  Keeping things alive is a big struggle.  They are warning that dogs left outside will die.  I guess the weather is bad for dogs - but it is also bad for humans!  They cancelled school for yesterday and today.  I am not sure if we can go back tomorrow or not.  The roads are not cleared yet, and with the wind that is blowing, my guess is that even if they are cleared, they will quickly drift back shut.  Jim and I did make it in to work today and yesterday, but the roads were far from good.  The buses we have currently are not good in the snow, and of course, diesel fuel has never been amazing in the extreme cold.  I am hoping they just cancel for tomorrow as well.  Time will tell I guess.  I am sure that running routes will be a burdensome task.  Perhaps we just try next week, when the weather is supposed to be in the 50's?  :)  

The girls and I have been busy trying to bed down animals, and keep heat lamps going.  It is a struggle to try to get outside animals any amount of comfort through this.  My dad's cows are calving, and I can't think of a worse shock than being born on days like these.  Mom has been blow drying calves like crazy.  Some of them are so cute!  I feel sorry for them.  I hope the warm weather hurries up and gets here!  Our goats are due to kid in mid-March- praying that this weather is long gone by then!  Speaking of kids, Madison and the girls worked really hard, but their little goat did not make it.  They were pretty sad about it.  Goat kids are so weird.  They can be fine one minute and dead the next for no real reason that you can see.  They can eat themselves to death if you aren't careful.  You can have a myriad of diseases that they can catch if their umbilical cord isn't treated with iodine as close to birth as possible.  They can also go down and stay down for weeks and although you think they will die, they don't, and you can spend hundreds of dollars on trying to figure out why.  It is sort of a crap shoot.  We have learned so much about them, but there are just so many unknowns, so many variables that no matter what you do, your success rate will never be perfect.  Such is life with livestock. 

This girl - always makes me laugh.  She is just now starting to talk - and one of her first words - beef jerky!  Yes - seriously!  :)  She is a hoot!  I was telling the older kids recently that Colin didn't talk until he was 2.  We went into the kitchen one morning and he said "I would like a pop tart please" clear as day.  I about fell over.  He did the same thing when potty training - one day declared he wanted to wear underwear and never had an accident.  Some kids are just like that.  

Evie's chocolate frog!  :)  

We got a huge kick out of Cash when we went to visit Colin and Spencer on Sunday.  This dog likes to hold your hand, likes to howl and whine when he is excited - and is definitely a fan of having company!  He is one of the cutest dogs I have ever seen!  He is a good boy!  Volt liked having us there, he seems like he is really mellowing out in his old age!  

Our dogs have done nothing but lay around the house.  I have to physically pick up Carlos and push him out the door, or he would never go out.  He hates the cold.  I agree with him!  When he comes back in, he lays on the furnace vent and shivers.  I do feel sorry for him, and we do not leave him out for very long, but everyone has to go potty right?  He is a widdle baby dog.  He also wiggles his way out of his sweaters - he seems to like them for a little while, but then will roll around until he can wiggle out.  I wonder if he gets itchy?  I remember my mom trying to make us wear sweaters, I HATED them!  So much itchiness.  :)  I will never be one of those old grammies in the nursing home with a sweater on - no thank you - I would rather not be itchy!  Give me a flannel shirt, or a fleece blanket any day!

Anyway, I think I need to have winter end so I can start in on some outdoor projects.  I am off on too much random thinking in this weather!  

Here is hoping that next week will really be in the 50 degree range that they are predicting and that winter is over very soon!  

 

No rest for the wicked

Yesterday afternoon, I had a text from the lady who we occasionally buy goats from, saying she had a triplet that was rejected and needed a bottle holding girl.   I had to work last night, and had a trip planned to see the Wichita kids, so I definitely didn’t have time.   I called Madison to see if Evie might like to get a little goat going and then when it warms up, and she is down to 2 bottles a day I will take her to the barn.  They were excited and ran over to get the baby.  The girls have had fun feeding and playing with her.  She was a little lethargic today, so on our way home I stopped and got her some vitamins.  A little while later, Madison said the vitamins apparently helped because she was hopping into the dishwasher.  I had flashbacks to Curley!   When we stopped, we were only there for a few minutes, and I’m already attached.  I swear nothing is cuter than a baby goat!  

Unless it is a puppy.  One of the reasons we went to Wichita today was so we could pick out a puppy from the litter.  I had already sort of selected the one I wanted, and I confirmed it when I held her and she melted into my arms and licked me on the chin.  She is the sweetest little baby girl!  The mother dog had 14 puppies!   You can’t imagine how many that is unless you’re looking at them all and trying to decide which one to pick when there are literally 14 of the sweetest little faces looking at you.  It was good that Jim was there, or else I might have changed my mind about only getting one baby!   

I can’t wait until the girls see her!  I think I have decided to name her Maude.  

This is the one!  The black and white one - she will be coming home over spring break.  I absolutely cannot wait!  Maude is the baby with the brown collar.  

When I was growing up, there was a lady who lived up the road from us - Maude Butler.  She had 2 rat terriers who were severely overweight.  She made her own dog food - and my grandma and I helped her more than once.  Those dogs ate better than some people I know.  She was someone who absolutely fascinated me as a child.  She knew how to do so much stuff. From gardening, to canning, to making her own soap to rendering lard. She was always doing something from “the olden days.”  She had a ton of stories from her life with her husband during the Great Depression. She told us about her mother hiding from Quantrill’s raiders.  She grew the most amazing gardens and fruit trees and she lived alone, so then she would load all sorts of produce in her car and come driving around the neighborhood handing out the extra stuff she didn’t need.  She was generous, energetic and I never knew her when she wasn’t old. I absolutely loved her.  She died shortly after Jim and I got married.  I still drive by her house and think about her.  She was 99 years old when she passed. I remember when she turned 90, she told my grandma that she had never had a birthday party, and had decided to throw one for herself.  We helped her set up, she had cake and roses and party favors. She put tons of energy into planning, and grandma picked up all of the things she requested, as she didn’t drive too far anymore by that point.  We attended her party and then stayed to help her clean up.  When we were done, she sat down in a chair and said “I can’t believe my party is over….”  It was the saddest thing I had ever seen and I have never forgotten the look on her face.  If you have to get old, you can only hope to grow old the way she did.  Full of spunk and energy and ideas and projects.  I know she wouldn’t be insulted that I named a dog after her.  She would probably be proud about it.  And the name just seems fitting.  

Colin and Spencer seem to be doing well. I enjoyed seeing the progress they are making on their guest bathroom.  It looks amazing.  I know they have put in a ton of work, learning and effort.  I am proud of them for tackling it!  We had a nice lunch and held puppies. It was a good day!  I always love seeing my kids! 

This one was home for part of the weekend.  We stopped by to see her at work before we headed back.  I had fun getting caught up with her as well.  

I didn’t get much sleep, didn’t accomplish much of what I needed to this weekend, and am definitely not ready for the weekend to end, but here we are anyway!  The weather sounds like it’s going to get a little wonky again, so maybe we will get a day at home to catch up later?   

Glad we had some family time and catching up!  

 

Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is a day that I would love to celebrate big. The reality is, that as our children were growing up, it seemed like someone was always sick, and having a day of romance when people are throwing up just doesn’t work.  Not to mention the man I love just isn’t really into candles or fanciness.   So when Evelyn very sadly told me that she has never had a romantic candle light dinner, and asked me if I would have a candlelight dinner with her, I just couldn’t say no.  

Did I get a little crazy?  Maybe.   Did I invite the big kids?   Yes!  Am I happy about it?  You bet your buns!  

Cameron even came down for a little while and brought Evelyn flowers! GG came over for dinner and crafts.  We had a menu planned by Evie.  Gooslaw (goulache) and garlic bread.  Mallory helped Evelyn make heart shaped cookies. And we had chocolate!   I wanted to make chocolate covered strawberries, but the current state of strawberries in the stores left me disappointed.  

Andrew and Madison took Evie shopping for a fancy dress.  We ate our gooslaw by candlelight.  I’m not sure I would call it romantic, but it was fun!  And Evelyn was happy which in turn makes me very happy!  

Wren was really excited by her Valentine’s Day treats, but she was a little under the weather. Which makes me return to wondering why the heck they put a romantic holiday snack in the middle of cold and flu season?  

Ah well, you need a little fun in the midst of winter I guess!  Happy Valentine’s Day.  

 

another week closer to spring!

I cannot for the life of me recall what goal Mallory's 1st graders accomplished, but she had to dress up as a "glam-ma" because of it.  I am just going to throw my 2 cents worth into this.  You know -  because it is my blog and stuff.  There seems to be a lot of hate thrown at public schools, and specifically at public school teachers lately.  The president of the country, in my view has lowered the bar so low for human decency that the bar is laying on the ground.  So, this week, when he put out a tweet saying that "spending millions on educators, many of whom  are ugly", and that the department of education is 'horrible' and whatever other nonsense he spews, I again rolled my eyes.  Anyone who has not set foot in a public school ought to not comment on it.  Period.  Anyone who has not seen or met my daughter, ought to shut their mouths about her work.  Period.  These teachers, these PEOPLE are superheroes.  They deal with hard things because their hands are tied by bureaucracy, and yet they are still educating children. I cannot tell you the number of times my daughter has been here crying because of things people have said to her, or about a child who was taken away and she can't really talk about it, but she is worried about what will happen to them.  About how many weekends she has showed up at my house needing help to cut out any number of projects she is trying to create so that she can help her students be successful.  The number of hours she has put into classes to make herself a better educator.  The seriousness she has towards helping every single child achieve success.  She is underpaid for the amount of work she puts in, she is underappreciated for the things she does.  The American public is unbelievably lucky to have the benefit of free public education for every single kid regardless of ethnicity, class status, gender, race, or anything else.  To say that there aren't problems would be wrong.  To say you can't improve it - would be wrong.  But to just yank the rug out from under people, and to call them names and degrade them - makes me see red.  And then to think it came from a bunch of oligarch jerks makes it even worse.  This country is unrecognizable to me - definitely not a place that I am proud to live in right now.  My daughter - she will be fine.  We will make sure she is fine.  I can't say what will happen to schools, but I am incredibly angry and also just sad.  Ok sorry  - rant over.

Madison sent me this proof from Evie's kindergarten photos.  The attitude is so Evelyn - she is a trip!  I love this kid!  So funny! 

Madison also sent me this old photo of Colin and Cameron in their matching mohawks and matching WWE vests that Auntie Grace made for them.  It was a good laugh and good memories - my boys always with their "guy stuff" and crazy hair.  I miss them being little.  Yes, they are good adults and I like the people they grew into, but raising boys is not for the weak, and I miss the chaos! Colin has been remodeling their bathroom.  I am impressed with the work he has learned to do.  I am also impressed with the mirror that he sent me a photo of - Spencer installed it with a back light that is motion sensored He was pretty impressed with her skill as well.  They decided to tackle the project together since they got an estimate and nearly choked on the price.  I am convinced that those 2 can learn to do anything.  It is impressive.  We are supposed to go down this weekend, I hope the weather cooperates with us.  I can't wait to see the work in person!

Today is a snow day.  School was cancelled due to the forecast yesterday - which is unusual, usually they wait until I have a shower and the bus warming up before they call it!  I don't think it is as bad as they predicted, but it is really cold, and we probably have 3-4 inches of snow.  I had a meeting last night, and I stayed and worked afterwards so I could take today off. I brought home a few projects, and have been making a few phone calls from inside my house in my pajamas.  I do love a snow day, the girls and I are chilling out, we got chores done and I am planning to make a pot of chicken and dumplings and cinnamon rolls this afternoon.  The problem is I want just 1 day.  As in, tomorrow, I want the sun out, the snow gone and life to be back to a normal place where we go to work and don't have the extra junk to deal with.   Basically, I want the impossible.  The girls were already off school tomorrow and Friday.  It is parent teacher week.  They have moved conferences to remote - and we are officially home with zero places to go.  Jim did go to work this morning.  He took the Nissan since it has 4wd.  He said he made it in just fine, with no real problems.  He has city council tonight, so skipping was not really in the cards for him.  

I am sure I could have gone in with Jim and would have been fine - but I sometimes really just enjoy a day with the dogs!  Oh and the girls!  :)  Saige got up a little bit under the weather, but I think she just has the same cold or that everyone else in the state has right now. 

Carlos hates the cold.  He is the biggest cold wimp!  He is my spirit animal!  I don't even have the heart to make him go out when we do chores.  He goes out for about 3 minutes at a time and then we let him come back inside.  Poor little cold boy.  He does look cute in his sweater though!

I started this post a couple days ago and never got it done.  The girls came over for a super bowl party.  When I say for the super bowl, I want to make it clear that whereas Poppy, Saige and Andrew were actually watching the game, and a few others were watching for the commercials, and Harper refused to even leave the basement, some us were just in it for the snacks!  :)  When I say some of us - I mean me - and the grandkids.  We love snacks for dinner!  

I had to work at the liquor store for a while before the game.  It was insane in there!  At one point, I had a bunch of customers, and a sack split and the customer dropped a bottle of red wine.  In a store full of stuff that could break, this one is the absolute worst!  Red wine is sticky, smelly, and stains the floor!  One of the owners came over to bring me more paper towels, and helped me get the mess cleaned up.  Not the best timing for sure!  I was thankful that when I came home, Madison and Mallory had mostly finished getting everything ready.  It was nice to kick off my shoes and just relax and hang out with my little buddies.  So I guess you can see my theme of the week - staying home and relaxing.  Not the worst thing I ever thought about doing.